Thursday, March 22, 2007
Against ABU commercial?
Haunted?
See: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4x-qmzyCVuY
Word of street?
See: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qjOHb1k2_A
Real testimony?
See: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9n5Nn7ofrTM
I hope no one trust these....
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Biology Teacher got fired?
With AUCC team coming to ABU, one of the major questions they ask was about academic freedom. They were afraid that christian institutions may limit the level of degree of academic freedom because the institution may not allow exploration of knowledge outside of the christian worldview. However, from my experience, it is exactly the opposite.
ABU faculties are free to explore from any points of view in order to seek the truth. We can research things in a much broader angle because secular univerisities may discourage exploring from the Christian perspective. So far, faculties have not forced me to do things I don't want to do. At least, we won't get fired with the same reason of this biology teacher.
Saturday, February 3, 2007
Sunday, January 21, 2007
Skating Part III

Today, I skate for the third time in my life. I believe I am progressing and I start to skate more towards the middle of ice. I begin to skate faster and faster, but I fail quite a few times.
My knees, my ankles, my waist are all hurting. I have been skating on bloody socks today. No pain, no gain I suppose. Hockey is the next thing on my ice agenda...
Saturday, January 20, 2007
Things to do during tests

I believe most of the following activities are prohibited in ABU as stated in your student handbook.
(Professional Slacker! Closed Course! Do not attempt!)
1. Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say ``oh geez, better get cracking'' and do some gibberish work.
2. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming ``Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!''
3. If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the surface integral symbol.
4. Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the instructor's left nostril.
5. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, ``I'm SOOO sure you can hear me thinking.'' Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.
6. Bring cheerleaders.
7. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it, loudly say to the instructor, ``I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?''
8. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.
9. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.
10. Bring pets.
11. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say ``They've found me, I have to leave the country'' and run off.
12. Fifteen minutes into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out ``Merry Christmas.'' If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat the process every fifteen minutes.
13. Do the exam with crayons, paint, or fluorescent markers.
14. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.
15. Come down with a BAD case of Turet's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible.
16. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up. For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.
17. Bring things to throw at the instructor when he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest you.
18. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.
19. Walk into the exam with an entourage. Claim you are going to be taping your next video during the exam. Try to get the instructor to let them stay, be persuasive. Tell the instructor to expect a percentage of the profits if they are allowed to stay.
20. Every five minutes, stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.
21. Turn in the exam approximately 30 minutes into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.
22. Do the entire exam as if it was multiple choice and true/false. If it is a multiple choice exam, spell out interesting things (DCCAB, BABE, etc.)
23. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.
24. Get the exam. Twenty minutes into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out ``Fuck this!'' and walk out triumphantly.
25. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (e.g. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to get drunk.)
26. Show up completely drunk. (Completely drunk means that at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy.)
27. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him in a very derogatory tone, ``The light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!''
28. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.
29. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 minutes, put on a white mask and start yelling ``I'm here, the phantom of the opera'' until they drag you away.
30. Go to an exam for a class you have no clue about, where you know the class is very small, and the instructor would recognize you if you belonged. Claim that you have been to every lecture. Fight for you right to take the exam.
31. Bring a water pistol with you. 'Nuff said.
32. Try to get people in the room to do the wave.
33. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.
34. Start a brawl in the middle of the exam.
35. If the exam is math/science related, make up the longest proofs you could possibly think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.
36. Come in wearing a full knight's outfit, complete with sword and shield.
37. Bring a friend to give you a back massage the entire way through the exam. Insist this person is needed, because you have bad circulation.
38. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious. . . like history notes for a calculus exam. . . otherwise your're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment ``Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit.''
39. When you walk in, complain about the heat. Strip.
40. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him.
41. One word: Wrestlemania.
42. Bring balloons, blow them up, start throwing them around like they do before concerts start.
43. Do the exam on your laptop. Make sure the simulated keyboard noises are on.
44. Play frisbee with a friend on the other side of the room.
45. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.
46. Get deliveries of candy, flowers, balloons, telegrams, etc. sent to you every few minutes throughout the exam.
47. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Start with your calculator, move on to your desk, your chair, anything you can reach.
48. Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle.
49. Bring a musical instrument with you, play various tunes. If you are asked to stop, say ``it helps me think.'' Bring a copy of the Student Handbook with you, challenging the instructor to find the section on musical instruments during finals. Don't forget to use the phrase ``Told you so.''
50. Answer the exam with the ``Top Ten Reasons Why Professor Sussman Sucks.''
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
100 Fun Things to Do During a Boring Lecture
DISCLAIMER: DON'T BLAME IF YOU FAIL THE COURSE!- Bring a blowhorn. Use it when you ask or answer a question.
- Heckle the professor.
- Hire a video crew to come to the class. If asked about it, say that you have to tape the lecture for a friend.
- Bring a water gun. Shoot the professor when his back is turned.
- Get the other students in your row to do the wave.
- Bring a small chalkboard to class. Ask the professor if you can borrow his chalk to take notes.
- Contradict everything the professor says. Offer irrefutable scientific proof.
- If it's a math lecture, claim that the professor misspelled pi.
- When the professor asks a question, raise your hand. If the professor calls on you, point to someone in the next row and say "He knows." Pick a different person each time.
- Buy a doll. When you go to class, leave the doll in your chair, along with your notebook and pen. Say that you have an important meeting to go to, and that the doll will be taking notes for you.
- Bring a typewriter. Use it to take notes.
- Write a love note. Sign it "a secret admirer". Get someone to pass it to the professor.
- Get up to go to the bathroom five or six times during the class. Change clothes every time.
- While taking notes, write vulgar words every few lines. If anyone asks, say you have Tourette's syndrome.
- Buy a watermelon. Give it to the professor. If he/she asks, say "They were out of apples."
- Bring a small tape player. Play a tape of the previous lecture. Take notes on both.
- If it's an English class, ask how the theory of relativity relates to Shakespeare's "Midsummer Night's Dream".
- Pretend to be asleep until five minutes before the end of class. Then wake up and explain that you missed the lecture, and ask the professor to summarize what he/she talked about.
- Bring a can of spray paint. Use it to take notes on the classroom wall.
- Bring a fully-stocked picnic basket to class. Explain that you didn't have time to eat breakfast.
- Wear a loincloth to class. If anyone asks, say that it is your costume for the school play, and you didn't have time to change out of it.
- Tear out pages of the textbook and make little origami animals out of them. Have a whole menagerie by the end of class. Give them to the professor as a token of your esteem.
- Bring a fishing rod. Try to catch things on the professor's desk.
- Bring a tape player and a tape of a thunderstorm. Keep it hidden. Sometime during the lecture, start the tape, stand up, claim that the professor has angered the gods and leave. Watch to see how many students follow you after the tape starts playing.
- Make reserved seating cards and place them on the desks before class.
- Tell the professor you are on a new experimental cold medication that may have strange side effects. Every ten minutes or so, run around the room screaming. Afterward, claim that you have no memory of what just happened.
- Claim that you are the new student teacher, and that you are to give the lecture for that class. If the professor agrees, lecture on a subject completely opposite the to subject of the class. If the professor objects, say that the students should have a wide range of knowledge.
- Switch the professor's lecture notes with your history notes from last term.
- Raise your hand and ask when the movie is going to start.
- Bring a flash camera. Take pictures every few minutes, using a very bright flash. If anyone complains, say that you didn't see any sign saying you couldn't bring cameras.
- Bring a light bulb. Hold it over your head whenever you have the answer to a question.
- Bring an easel and a paint set. Paint a portrait of the professor during the lecture. Say that it is a homework assignment for art class
- Sneeze very loudly. Then, have the person next to you sneeze, then the person next to him, and so on. See how long it takes before the professor sneezes.
- When the professor comes in, say, very loudly, "Hey! A substitute! All right!" Claim that the real professor said you could have lecture outside.
- Come to class wearing the same outfit as the professor. Call the professor a copycat.
- If it's a geology lecture, switch the quartz crystals with New Folger's Crystals and see if the professor notices. Have a hidden camera.
- Hide a ticking clock under the podium. Call in a bomb threat.
- Write your assignment on Plato on your little sister's modeling clay.
- Ask questions in a foreign language you know the professor doesn't know. Act angry when he/she doesn't understand you.
- Come to class dressed as a professional wrestler. Tell people you joined the wrestling team. Bodyslam anyone who doesn't believe you.
- When the professor comes in, suddenly scream, "NOOOOOO! Not him! Not professor Johnson!! They let him teach again! Noooooooooo!" then run out of them room. See how many people follow you.
- Turn your row into a mosh pit.
- Before class starts, turn all the desks upside down. Sit on them like you would normally.
- Two words: American Gladiators.
- Make requests like people do at rock concerts. ("Relativity! Relativity! Einstein rocks!")
- Bring popcorn. Throw it and the professor. Complain that these trained animal shows aren't what they used to be.
- Bring a tape player and a tape of the school bell. Play it every 15 minutes.
- When the professor calls on you, mumble inconprehensibly. Answer every question in this fashion. See how long it takes before the professor stops calling on you.
- When you take a test, hire a security guard to stand by your desk and make sure no one cheats off your paper.
- Make up a strange religious cult and distribute flyers for it during class. If it is a religious studies class, complain that your cult was not included in the textbook, and demand that they get a new one.
- Smoke a pipe and respond to each point the professor makes by waving it and saying, "Quite right, old bean!"
- Wear X-Ray Specs. Every few minutes, ask the professor to focus the overhead projector.
- Sit in the front row and spend the lecture filing your teeth into sharp points.
- Sit in the front and color in your textbook.
- When the professor calls your name in roll, respond "that's my name, don't wear it out!"
- Introduce yourself to the class as the "master of the pan flute".
- Give the professor a copy of The Watchtower. Ask him where his soul would go if he died tomorrow.
- Wear earmuffs. Every few minutes, ask the professor to speak louder.
- Leave permanent markers by the dry-erase board.
- Squint thoughtfully while giving the professor strange looks. In the middle of lecture, tell him he looks familiar and ask whether he was ever in an episode of Starsky and Hutch.
- Ask whether the first chapter will be on the test. If the professor says no, rip the pages out of your textbook.
- Become entranced with your first physics lecture, and declare your intention to pursue a career in measurements and units.
- Sing your questions.
- Speak only in rhymes and hum the Underdog theme.
- When the professor calls roll, after each name scream "THAT'S MEEEEE! Oh, no, sorry."
- Insist in a Southern drawl that your name really is Wuchen Li. If you actually are Chinese, insist that your name is Vladimir Fernandez O'Reilly.
- Page through the textbook scratching each picture and sniffing it.
- Wear your pajamas. Pretend not to notice that you've done so.
- Hold up a piece of paper that says in large letters "CHECK YOUR FLY".
- Inform the class that you are Belgian royalty, and have a friend bang cymbals together whenever your name is spoken.
- Stare continually at the professor's crotch. Occassionally lick your lips.
- Address the professor as "your excellency".
- Sit in the front, sniff suspiciously, and ask the professor if he's been drinking.
- Shout "WOW!" after every sentence of the lecture.
- Bring a mirror and spend the lecture writing Bible verses on your face.
- Ask whether you have to come to class.
- Present the professor with a large fruit basket.
- Bring a "seeing eye rooster" to class.
- Feign an unintelligible accent and repeatedly ask, "Vet ozzle haffen dee henvay?" Become aggitated when the professor can't understand you.
- Relive your Junior High days by leaving chalk stuffed in the chalkboard erasers.
- Watch the professor through binoculars.
- Start a "wave" in a large lecture hall.
- Ask to introduce your "invisible friend" in the empty seat beside you, and ask for one extra copy of each handout.
- When the professor turns on his laser pointer, scream "AAAGH! MY EYES!"
- Correct the professor at least ten times on the pronunciation of your name, even it's Smith. Claim that the i is silent.
- Sit in the front row reading the professor's graduate thesis and snickering.
- As soon as the first bell rings, volunteer to put a problem on the board. Ignore the professor's reply and proceed to do so anyway.
- Claim that you wrote the class text book.
- Claim to be the teaching assistant. If the real one objects, jump up and scream "IMPOSTER!"
- Spend the lecture blowing kisses to other students.
- Every few minutes, take a sheet of notebook paper, write "Signup Sheet #5" at the top, and start passing it around the room.
- Stand to ask questions. Bow deeply before taking your seat after the professor answers.
- Wear a cape with a big S on it. Inform classmates that the S stands for "stud".
- Interrupt every few minutes to ask the professor, "Can you spell that?"
- Disassemble your pen. "Accidently" propel pieces across the room while playing with the spring. Go on furtive expeditions to retrieve the pieces. Repeat.
- Wink at the professor every few minutes.
- In the middle of lecture, ask your professor whether he believes in ghosts.
- Laugh heartily at everything the professor says. Snort when you laugh.
- Wear a black hooded cloak to class and ring a bell.
- Ask your math professor to pull the roll chart above the blackboard of ancient Greek trade routes down farther because you can't see Macedonia.
Academic Chapel
We have two academic chapels twice a year in ABU. This is the time when all faculty members hood themselves and show case to our students in chapel. The hood represents the different universities they got their degree from and it is a traditional academic experience.
I got my doctorate degree from the University of Western Ontario, but the grown and hood costs over $1000 and I could not afford it. I have to rent it and for some reasons, only the University of Toronto hood is available and that's what I am wearing today. UWO hoods are traditionally purple while UT hoods are traditionally red.
Wisdom come from God and knowing God is the beginning of wisdom. It is always wonderful to see a bunch of academic professors praising God together.